High Five Newsletter 1/25

JAN 25, 2024 | PRACTUS LLP

High Five Newsletter 1/25

Authored by Carol Rose

Legal news, some illegal. All of it interesting

1. Town Bans Cemeteries to Stop Family’s Plan for One

A Michigan couple, excited to start a cemetery – to each their own – is suing their local township for their right to burial rites.  They submitted plans to create a “green” cemetery on 20 acres, in which they’d bury deceased naturally, with no chemicals, vaults or nonbiodegradable caskets. Decomposing bodies would then nourish the forest, a la circle of life. But shortly after, township leaders unanimously passed an ordinance banning all cemeteries. They cite grave concerns over what happens to the land and its uh residents when the couple no longer owns the land. But the man and wife say state laws already address cemeteries’ required perpetual care.

Plot thickens here…

2. Passenger Notices Missing Bolts on Plane’s Wing

Welcome aboard Flight VS127. Please fasten your seatbelts and look around for missing bolts or loose stuff. Actually, the Virgin Atlantic crew didn’t mention those in their safety briefing, but one British passenger on the UK to New York flight noticed the wing was missing four of them anyway. Yes, he was gazing out the window during the briefing – who doesn’t – when he spotted missing fasteners. With  Alaska Airlines’ door blowout still fresh, he thought it worth a mention. The captain canceled departure and called engineers who inspected and said there was no danger. Each wing panel has 119 fasteners so missing four didn’t impact structural safety. Alrighty then.

We’ll take a boat here…

3. How You Look Could Be a Matter of Life & Death

Listen, we think you look great. But studies have long shown certain facial features, like downturned lips or a heavy brow, can cause strangers to perceive someone as dishonest. And a recent study out of Columbia University corroborates those findings – and more. It found that defendants with so-called untrustworthy facial features are more likely to receive a death sentence than life imprisonment. Mock jurors in experiments also tended to find defendants guilty more often based on their facial appearance. But don’t downturn your lips yet. The study also found that when jurors underwent intervention training, they reduced their reliance on facial feature stereotypes.

Turn that frown upside down here…

4. Chain Smoking Marathoner Dq’d, Cough, Cough

Rules are rules. And even though a 51-year-old runner finished a China marathon in three hours and 33 minutes, judges disqualified him. “Uncle Chen” didn’t let his cigarettes go out for 26 miles. China’s version of the Marlboro man huffed, but mostly puffed the entire course. He says the cigs help him with fatigue and he’s run others that way. But race officials say smoking, like open defecation and trampling flower beds, is strictly forbidden city. Although smoking and running is apparently a thing. The Chinese Athletics Association only implemented anti-smoking regulations last year in a bid to promote healthier exercise habits. Uncle Chen missed the memo.

Need a light here…

5. Grand Theft Stanley: Women Accused of Stealing 65!

The tumbler that determines whether you can hang in middle school or at yoga with other wine moms has pushed someone down a sippy slope. Police say a California woman loaded a shopping cart with Stanley cups and took off without paying. Staff members chased her, but she allegedly stuffed the contraband Quenchers in her trunk and drove off. Maybe Yeti fans mess around, but Stanley peeps take their TikTok viral, hydration vessels seriously. When police caught up to her, they found 65 stolen Stanleys, worth $2,500. That’s in addition to the one sitting in her drink holder. They say one Stanley cup in the drink holder’s worth 30 seized by police. Or something like that.

Her cups runneth over here…

The Authors

This Practus, LLP publication should not be construed as legal advice or legal opinion on any specific facts or circumstances. The contents are intended for general informational purposes only, and you are urged to consult your own lawyer on any specific legal questions you may have concerning your situation.

Search Icon