Legal news, some illegal. All of it interesting
1. You Gotta Fight for Your IP Rights
The Beastie Boys are suing the company behind Chili’s Grill & Bar. What in the bottomless chips and salsa’s going on? The 90’s rap trio feels chicken crispers about an ad posted to social media in which the restaurant chain re-created the Beasties’ famous Spike Jonze-directed video of their song “Sabotage” without permission. Talk about feeling kicked in the Texas dry rub ribs. Adam Horovitz, Michael Diamond, and Adam Yauch’s widow want Chili’s owner to “pay me back, pay me back, pay me back” at least $150K in monetary damages. And just so there’s no ill communication, the group says they don’t license any of their other intellectual property for advertising.
Heads are gonna Southwest Egg Roll here…
2. Back to Office in Philly Despite Birds
New mayor, new rules in Philadelphia. That means all 26K employees have been ordered back to the office five days a week. Public employee unions pressed a judge for more time arguing that dramatic changes in work conditions necessitate negotiations. Families will be scrambling for childcare. Plus, the birds. Union leaders warned that breeze by your ear outside municipal buildings isn’t the Liberty Bell ringing. It’s birds. And in a quote for the ages, a senior advisor pleaded, “No one should have to come to work with birds flying around.” But the judge was unflappable and sided with city officials, calling the change-up managerial prerogative.
3. Sippety Do Dah – At-Home Stills Ok
You can rum but you don’t have to hide. A federal judge in Texas ruled that the country’s 156-year-old ban on brewing moonshine at home is unconstitutional. Hooch there it is! The Hobby Distillers Association was in high spirits – emotional not alcoholic – at the win. They and four of their 1,300 members sued federal agencies, seeking an injunction. They argued the ban didn’t represent a valid practice of Congress’ taxing power because it didn’t raise revenue, it just fermented lime and punishment. The judge agreed but stayed his decision for two weeks, in case the government plans to move the party to a higher court for appeel.
4. Not Quite the Honeymoon Getaway They Envisioned
Months after their glitzy wedding, the honeymoon’s apparently over for a glamourous Scottsdale couple. Feds accuse Alexandra Gehrke (friends call her Lexie) and Jefferey King (he also DJ’s) of targeting elderly Medicare patients for $900M’s worth of unnecessary wound grafts. The newlyweds were about to board an international flight when authorities proposed a possible 85-year commitment and presented new rings – well, handcuffs. Now, they’re honeymooning in separate cells. Both judges denied bail – something to do with Gehrke transferring $30M into new accounts and the books in her carry-on bag: “How to Disappear: Erase your Digital Footprint, Leave False Trails and Vanish without a Trace” and “Criminal Law Handbook.”
Don’t expect wedding gifts to be returned here…
5. Don’t Love Me Tinder: Woman Calls 911 to Ditch Date
An 18-year-old Iowa woman seriously bumbled breaking a date with a man she’d matched with through an app. Instead of canceling, she called 911, claiming the man at her door was her abusive ex and the father of her unborn child and he was threatening to hit, punch, kick, and stab her. Police felt catfished. They arrived to find a calm man leaving the property, who showed no signs of hitting, punching kicking, and/or stabbing anyone. The woman admitted making it all up, because she didn’t feel like going on the date. Now she’s got another date – a court date – to face misdemeanor counts of making false police and 911 reports.